That time I was stooged by Adam Hills

A bit of Background

Okay, so here’s the thing.

I had tickets to Adam Hill’s In Gordon Street Tonight this week.  Being a long term fan of his stand up and Spicks and Specks I jumped at the opportunity to grab tickets.  In retrospect, that may come back to haunt me.

As part of the deal to be in the audience they ask you to fill in a three page form weeks ahead of the show.

I can’t recall what I replied with as my partner was in labour at the time (she was filling in hers as well – it was early stages okay!).  It was soon forgotten and we made plans to head out to Elsternwick for the taping of the show.  I was stupidly under the impression I would be a mere audience member.

The Sting

On Friday a work mate invited me out for a coffee.  Not an unusual circumstance as he’s a hardcore caffeine addict.  We left work and were soon accosted in the street by a really aggressive Chugger (Charity Mugger) in a koala suit.  Like, really aggressive.  He had a thick English accent (a lot of them do – backpackers, mostly).  Oh and he was dressed as a koala.  I soon realised each corner had similarly clad droopy looking marsupials waiving red buckets about.

I tried to palm him off, but he cut me off and then started to touch me.  Yes, I did get a little angry at that point.  Then Mr Aggressive Koala called over a mate (also a koala, albeit a very tall and well-built one), and things became a bit more physical.  After a little pushing on their behalf and some eloquence on mine (I believe I used the Oscar Wilde inspired phrase, ‘fuck off’) I walked away.  Strangely my mate stayed behind and was obviously getting pushed around.  I came back into the fray not wanting to leave a mate hanging, despite the fact that he does Jiu Jitsu and I have feeble IT arms.

Then the Koala Collective call over their mates – suddenly we’re surrounded by ten koalas chanting ‘Tight arse, tight arse!’

Then just as I’m about to deck one of them, Adam Hills takes off his koala head and everyone has a laugh.

Stooged.  Royaly.  With a crown and everything.

Apparently on the form I stated I really hate Chuggers.  This turn of events hasn’t changed that much.

Sneaky Behind the scenes business…..

How did I not twig?  How did I not know what was going on? I honestly couldn’t remember what I put on the form, let alone made the connection with these aggressive koalas up in my grill.  Even when Adam said something about In Gordon Street, I was so angry I couldn’t connect the dots (I never said I was clever).  If this sounds like a lame attempt to justifying my lack of wherewithal to know I was being punked, it’s only because it is.

Of course my mate was in on it.  He was contacted by my lovely (and damn sneaky) partner who was liaising with the show’s producers.  My mate was on the phone to one of them when I came into his office to head down.

My first reaction?  Hug Adam of course.  How could you not?  He’s the nicest guy in showbiz.  Though he still stooged me…….

We had a good old chat, much to the bemusement of passers-by.  Apparently when they had the production meeting to discuss the audience surveys and what they could do on the show, collectively they had about five or six ideas – most of them were from my form.  Lucky for me (!?!) Chuggers was chosen.

Adam was really pleased with the result.  He said these things could often go wrong, they don’t get the right reaction, or the person catches on too early and they aren’t able to use any footage.  With about twenty staff on hand that day, I’m glad I didn’t let them down. Lucky I was slow.  Wait, what?

I’ve since gone back to the form and my exact words were:

On the night

Filming occurs Monday night and airs Wednesday.

My mate from work was given tickets by the producers.  Fortunate really, he didn’t even know who Adam Hills was before he was contacted by the show.   Really.

Taping usually goes for two hours and they edit it down to the hour show.  Our night taped for three.  This was primarily due to the three guests.  Ross Noble was brilliant and went off of so many tangents Adam didn’t even ask him a question in the half hour or so they chatted (plus he gave Adam a bloody nose by jumping on him).  Alain de Botton and Thomas Keneally were great, but also talked for an exceptionally long time.  That’s an hour and half of material that will end up on the cutting room floor, if there was such a thing.  Which there isn’t.  It’ll be on a hard drive….but that sounds altogether less sexy.

When I was interviewed I have no idea if I gave articulate answers or came off as a complete twat.  I’m taking a stab and think I ended up more of the latter.

At least I got to tell Adam Hills (the nicest guy in showbiz) to get fucked on the ABC.

My life – never dull.

And before you ask, no…….I don’t know what’s the deal with the guy in the hat.